Diary Day: Klinsi's diaries discovered!

Monday, November 4, 2019: A call from Germany. A Mr. Windhorst is on the line. A very unpleasant guy, only concerned with money. But he has an interesting offer for Jürgen Klinsmann, offering a spectacular fee! Klinsmann is supposed to become a member of the supervisory board of a football club. The name is Hertha Berlin, I suspect? Apparently they play in the Bundesliga? The lawyers are looking into it.

Monday, November 25, 2019: First meeting with the club's management. Klinsmann treats even the lower-level employees in the office with respect. It's a matter of decency. He patronizingly pats the cheek of a somewhat awkward, bespectacled employee before throwing his coat over his arm. Naturally, he also wants to learn all their names. "What's your name again?" Klinsmann asks the employee curiously. The employee replies: "Preetz." Good to know.

Tuesday, 11/26/2019 Pleasant closing dinner with Lars Windhorst and the Tennor team. Simply wow, this vision, this knowledge, these insights. I'm excited that we're launching the Big City Club project together. However, his expertise has zero visibility on the board. What manager Preetz and co don't understand: At the end of the day, a stronger involvement of Lars would also contribute to the brand's account. But the corresponding processes are not being set up. Sure, the topic is tricky, of course it would have to be languaged accordingly. But the fact that nothing is happening is sad. He would be a fantastic performance manager; no club in Germany would have more leverage. Such low-level acceptance is a shame. People say we have the same smile. So true.

Saturday, November 30, 2019 Still no help from President Gegenbauer, Preetz, or anyone else at the club in finding an apartment. Jürgen Klinsmann and his staff still have to live en suite at the "Hotel de Rome," like wild animals. The buffet is a disaster; pure egg-white omelets are only available upon express request, and lychees are completely missing from the fruit salad. The TV in the room only has 27 US channels and can't be upgraded upon request. Berlin remains in the Stone Age; the situation is untenable. Klinsmann has to explore the penthouse market himself, on top of the workload of two hours of training every day. No relief, nothing. Heartburn.

Tuesday, December 3, 2019. Communication is a complete disaster. Jürgen Klinsmann tells Preetz about Facebook Live. The CEO reacts confusedly. Klinsmann is forced to create accounts for Preetz and Gegenbauer, but contrary to the agreement, the two continue to communicate via ICQ and MySpace. Facebook, the innovative medium, is neglected, so the club never makes it to 2014. Press relations are also abysmal. When Jürgen Klinsmann leaks information to the "Bild" newspaper, he is looked at askance. There is no basis for trust.

Friday, December 6, 2019: The squad is completely wrongly assembled. With both reserve goalkeepers constantly injured, Jürgen Klinsmann has been deprived of his most important tactical formula for success: the unnecessary removal of the first-choice goalkeeper. It is extremely damaging to the project that Michael Preetz, despite repeated requests, has not agreed to at least contact Michael Rensing, who is out of contract and therefore available for immediate replacement.

Saturday, December 14, 2019 Next problem: The press is reporting that Klinsmann's coaching license is no longer valid. What? Or rather, what? Immediately, unpleasant rumors circulate that Klinsmann's snake-oil salesman license expired years ago. Such nonsense. And the club: remains silent. No support whatsoever. That's no way to treat a Gold Cup-winning coach.

Wednesday, December 18, 2019 Problems everywhere. Squad structure, logistics, insufficient Wi-Fi bandwidth for smooth Facebook Live videos, missing Buddha statues at the training ground, not a single Landon Donovan in the squad, barely a closing dinner. The first interpersonal rifts are also emerging: In the canteen, Preetz and Gegenbauer are served three meatballs, while Jürgen Klinsmann only has two. Initial doubts about structures, compliance, connections, etc. But not like this! The sale of Ondrej Duda is a reaction to the lack of meatballs. Daily work life is suffering from the power struggles.

Friday, December 20, 2019 Unsustainable conditions in the medical department. No dynamism, weak structures, lazy and rude staff. It was called syndesmosis, outrageous, just imagine. The doctor, Dr. Uli Schleicher (name says it all!), doesn't even have a Facebook page, but he does have an MRI. Despite the pain (a hangnail), he's unavailable to Klinsmann. Schleicher has been in office for 22 years. When Klinsmann asks whether Schleicher applies leeches to the players or shoe horses on the side, Preetz remains staunchly silent. Typical. Here, too: no willingness to innovate, a refusal to cooperate everywhere. Klinsmann's orgonite wasn't even looked at, an Akashic column was rejected, and there's no money for a cryogenic capsule. Silly.

Saturday, December 28, 2019. Rigid structures, an innovation-hostile transfer strategy. Instead of signing promising talents like Mesut Özil, Julian Draxler, or Landon Donovan, as repeatedly suggested by Jürgen Klinsmann, Preetz puts the brakes on, radiating no joy. For the first time, Jürgen Klinsmann has a terrible thought: invest 80 million in shady transfers and then leave. Nero's order! A spontaneous, quick business call with Stuttgart. It's only 3 a.m., lunchtime in Florida! Klinsmann calls Mislintat out of bed, makes an offer for Ascica..., for Astici..., well, for that guy. Mislintat is crying with joy, wants to bring the player to Berlin personally tonight. Tomorrow will do.

Thursday, January 2, 2020 Absurd overconfidence: the club is sticking with its training camp in the USA. In the midst of preseason, when there's no time to lose, every second counts, and all processes must be meticulously planned. Therefore, after the start of training, Jürgen Klinsmann, disillusioned, decides to take a short retreat to his home state of California. Three, four, five, six days to clear his head and let Michael Preetz's amateurish planning sink in.

Friday, January 3, 2020. The training camp is also a disaster. The team isn't fit. Klinsmann sends one of the older players to head the ball, but he drops out after a few attempts, completely exhausted. He writes down the name and vows to himself: Ingo Schiller will never play under him again.

Saturday, January 4, 2020. Second day of training camp. The mood is at rock bottom. So, a last-minute decision: a visit to Windhorst's yacht. The seven-hour bus ride to the coast flies by. Windhorst hugs Klinsmann. The air smells of eggnog. Particularly impressive is the investor's high-quality music collection: two clarinets, a historic oboe, and various other valuable instruments. On the return trip, the players are impressed by the investor's wealth. One even mentions a gold-plated toilet. A gold-plated toilet? Later that evening, an outraged call from Windhorst. A player has defecated in Windhorst's trombone. Klinsmann apologizes for the mistake.

Sunday, January 19, 2020: Hertha narrowly loses 4-0 to Bayern, clearly the better team. Well done! Gegenbauer nevertheless spreads a sour mood in the locker room, which only improves when Lars Windhorst enters the players' quarters. A highlight for everyone present; the boys are super happy. The players improvise a red carpet out of training vests, and many cry. When it's a member of the coaching staff's turn to kneel before Windhorst and kiss the ring, he has an epiphany. He writhes on the floor for minutes, drooling profusely and speaking in tongues. Only then does Arne slowly come to. It's a wonderful audience until the heavens part and Windhorst gently floats away (in a twin-engine Cessna) to the happy cheers of everyone present. No one from the club is present. No Preetz, no PR, not even a social media post. Tennor shares fall by half a percentage point. That's not kind.

Sunday, January 26, 2020. No cohesion within the squad, no code of conduct for the players to follow. Arne Maier simply goes to the media with his transfer request instead of letting Klinsmann leak the news to the Springer press. This is outrageous and contradicts all principles of professionalism. Jürgen Klinsmann is doing the only right thing and asking Maier for a discreet one-on-one meeting. Open visors, complete trust. As soon as Maier reads about this in tomorrow's "Bild" (Berlin-Brandenburg regional edition), he'll come crawling back for a report.

Wednesday, February 5, 2020: Still no praise from Gegenbauer, no recognition from Preetz. This negative culture is shocking. Yet the record is already better than it's been in years. Thumbs-up emojis dominate Facebook Live broadcasts, along with many laughing emojis; tearful faces are scarce. In keeping with his positive nature, Klinsmann sees angry emojis as an incentive to improve a little every day. He, too, never stops learning. But this culture of optimization is completely alien to Preetz and Gegenbauer. Everything is being held back; Facebook isn't a decisive factor in the Bundesliga, according to Preetz. Unworldly! Klinsmann's dislike.

Saturday, February 8, 2020 The German coaching system is completely outdated. Jürgen Klinsmann needs more power and now has to get Preetz to approve every minor change. Often enough, even strategically important moves fail due to the manager's refusal. Jonathan Klinsmann is not returning to Hertha, even though a number five goalkeeper at the Oberliga level would make sporting sense. Klinsmann's nephews John, Joe, Jim, Jimbo, and Juri are not allowed to be hired as full-time ballboys (Preetz: "The B-youth team does that for free"), and a job offer for Klinsmann's mother Martha as Head of Hertha Bakery also falls through. There is no bakery on the premises, so the pretext goes. Ridiculous. A distant relative of Klinsmann, whose resume as an insurance salesman in Böblingen makes him ideal for the position of team nutritionist, is not even heard by Preetz when he shows up uninvited for an interview at the office. Can such arrogance create a powerful team? Germans have always underestimated the importance of the team behind the team.

Tuesday, February 11, 2020: Klinsmann resigns, but doesn't flee. He's still very close to Berlin, staying with his mother on Lake Constance. Peace and quiet for now, zero visibility. He sniffs the air with delight. Klinsmann's mother has cooked. They're having meatballs.